autophobia

I let myself believe I am ugly, stupid, boring and no-one will like me.
I tell myself no-one understands me; that in fact, no-one will ever understand me.
I spend all my money on alcohol and then can't afford to do anything else.
I always get scared and don't try any thing new. That includes meeting new people or doing new things.
I let other people boss me around and tell me who I am, and what I can do.
I tell myself I am a black sheep and I will never fit in.
I think there is something wrong with me.I feel tense empty and stressed inside.
I see myself as having little value.
"I am useless", "I am stupid", "I always fail".
I have negative beliefs about myself and what I can do.
"I will never be able to…" "I can't do…" "That will never work".
I lose confidence and the future looks like nothing will change.
I have little trust in the things in my life.
I believe the world can't meet my personal needs and desires.
I stop bothering to try to achieve things.
I notice I am less happy and successful than other people.
I see other people as more capable or powerful than I am. I let them do things for me or take advantage of me.
I silently get annoyed, resentful or disappointed with those people.
I see myself as nasty or "ungrateful" for having those thoughts about others.
I tell myself off. I punish myself for being so horrible.
When I see myself, I see only the results of being abused by others or by myself.
I develop a stronger belief that I am not an OK person.
I push away self-esteem and prepare for this cycle to happen again and again.